Consumer Retorts: Amazon.com

Not surprisingly, Amazon extinguished all the fury out of me. Then, when things didn't go as planned after the first customer service go-round (the conversation with Raja*, which is referenced), a supervisor SERIOUSLY took the wind out of my sails by offering to let me steal someone's going-away cake. I was very persnickety with poor Ernest, but in my defense, my instincts weren't altogether off--as soon as I was a stinker, he gave me the "How about yous guys" act.

Here are the items in question (even Alanis Morissette would find this ironic):

Initial Question: Cancelled order was charged and shipped

01:39 AM(GMT) Ernest(CSA): Hello, my name is Ernest and I would be happy to assist you. I'm sorry that you had to contact us today about an order status.

May I have the order number please?

01:39 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: Hi Ernest-- Can you see my previous chat? I'm sorry, I don't have the order number

Do I need to go find it?

01:40 AM(GMT) Ernest(CSA): What does the order contain?

01:41 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: Two Knock-Knock notepads.

01:42 AM(GMT) Ernest(CSA): I'm showing a request was entered for this to be canceled, however it was unable to be successfully canceled Stef.

01:45 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: I actually know that already.

01:46 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: Can you see my previous chat? or the the email correspondence that was sent to me regarding this order?

01:46 AM(GMT) Ernest(CSA): Yes I can.

What am I looking for?

01:47 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: Could I trouble you to read it, instead of me retyping everything?

01:48 AM(GMT) Ernest(CSA): Can you give me an idea of what I'm looking for though?

01:48 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: Ernest, can I speak to someone else, please?

01:49 AM(GMT) Ernest(CSA): Stef, I'm reading your contact with Raja, but I'm still not sure what I'm supposed to be looking for.

01:50 AM(GMT) Ernest(CSA): He states he successfully canceled your order for Levenger Lamy Safari Rollerball White and GoFit Women'S Cross Training Glove With Etched Synthetic Leather Palm (Black/Pink, Small)

01:50 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: I don't mean to be difficult, but I am incredibly irritated--

01:50 AM(GMT) Ernest(CSA): I'm not seeing anything within this chat conversation regarding the notepad order you stated you are contacting us about.

I see he has set a follow up?

01:51 AM(GMT) Ernest(CSA): Due on Jul 2, 2013 6:00 PM

He also stated that once he successfully redirects the order, he will refund you in full for the items.

01:52 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: Okay, timeout. Here is a quick recap of what has happened so far:

“Me: Cancelled order was shipped

01:53 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: Ernest: I see that order didn't get cancelled

01:54 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: Me: Can you see my previous chat? (second time asking)

I know it wasn’t cancelled,

Ernest: yes, can you tell me about it anyway?

01:55 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: Me: Can I talk to someone else?”

01:55 AM(GMT) Ernest(CSA): Stef, I'm sorry that you are frustrated, and I want to help you resolve the issue. So how about you tell me what it is specifically you are wanting in this situation. You wanted the notepads, cancelled, I understand that and they were shipped because they couldn't be cancelled. Are you wanting refunded for the items?

01:56 AM(GMT) Ernest(CSA): I just need to know what you are wanting in this

situation. I can't help you unless I know what it is specifically you are wanting us to do.

01:59 AM(GMT) Ernest(CSA): I don't mean to rush you, however the chat has been idle for a few minutes, and I'm wondering if we're still connected.

01:59 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: I specifically would like to speak to a supervisor. When I spoke to Raja, I was assured that the situation would be resolved, I can see that you are attempting to mitigate

02:00 AM(GMT) Ernest(CSA): I'll be happy to get you a supervisor.

One minute.

02:00 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: Thank you.

02:02 AM(GMT) Ernest(CSA): It looks like there is currently a wait for a supervisor of 5-10 minutes. I can wait with you while until a supervisor is available. Or I can offer to refund this order in full and send you an email confirmation of the refund since the order was not redirected by Raja as promised.

02:04 AM(GMT) Ernest(CSA): I understand it's frustrating and I hope you understand that I'm not trying to make this difficult for you, I simply want to get this resolved for you but with limited information it's hard to figure out exactly what issue we are trying to solve without reviewing every account detail and annotation.

I also understand it's frustrating when someone ensures you they are going to take an action and it's not completed successfully and although I'm not sure why the package was not redirected and refunded, I do understand this is not a fault of yours.

02:06 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: I appreciate that sincerely, Ernest. I would still like to speak to a supervisor.

It isn't in reference specifically to this transaction, it's the entire experience

02:07 AM(GMT) Ernest(CSA): Completely understandable.

02:10 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: I will ask for a refund and can label the package with "Return to sender" or whatever the recommended action is, but I have used Amazon for a very long time, and I would rather notify someone of my poor experience than curtail use.

02:12 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: And at this point, I've invested too much time that I would have preferred doing things I want to do

02:12 AM(GMT) Ernest(CSA): We definitely don't want you to feel that you shouldn't shop with Amazon anymore, and the refund offering doesn't even require a return. You are more than welcome to keep the items as a goodwill gesture from Amazon for the experience or return them if you wish. But I'll definitely be glad to get you over to that supervisor.

So they can take the feedback about your experience, and offer resolution to this situation.

02:12 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: Thank you.

02:16 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: Mr. Jay, I would like to resolve this issue, but also make Amazon aware of the frustration I've felt during this process

02:16 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): I will definitely do my best to try and help you here. Would you mind if I reviewed your previous chat?

02:17 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: I know that Amazon is a company that seriously values customer service, and I seriously value Amazon and do not want to be soured.

And absolutely not. I would appreciate that very much.

02:18 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: You might start with the chat I had with Raja first.

02:18 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): Ok, I will take a look at the contact prior to this as well. Thank you very much for your patience with me.

02:22 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): Ok sorry about that long wait there

02:23 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): I see you were speaking to Raja and he let you know that the sellers were contacted to cancel the orders from them and that he stated he cancelled the order with the items coming from Amazon.

02:24 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: Prior to the chat I’d had with Raja, I’d spent probably 10 minutes in horror that I’d managed to order everything in my cart because A. I avoid paying shipping and use Super-saver at every opportunity—I’m the customer that feature was made for because I WILL spend $24 more than I’d planned to avoid $10 shipping; and B. I am tech savvy enough to normally know when I’m ordering and when I’m sticking stuff in the cart to ruminate over.

So then, I spent another 10 minutes figuring out how to call Amazon, only to fill out the form and find out that I CAN’T call Amazon (I use the Google phone feature in Gmail).

02:25 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): aww.. I know where you're coming from on that one. My wife keeps our cart so full all the time, if I did that, I wouldnt HAVE a bank account!

02:26 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: Yes and no? He was going to attempt to cancel it-- but assured me that it would be taken care of.

02:27 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: I did receive the email where he said that he couldn't... but during the chat I specifically asked, "what action do I need to take to make this happen?"

And again, in the follow up email, he said that it would be taken care of.

02:28 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): Yes, I see that as well.

02:29 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: I appreciate your humor. I promise, I'm not actually a nightmare. The irony of being the customer who loses it over the cancellation of "douchebag citation"s and "WTF" tickets is not lost on me.

02:29 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): haha

I think I see where the issue came from in the first place, by looking at the orders.

02:30 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: I forgot about the 25 minutes I spent trying to cancel the orders before even attempting to contact Amazon. The thing is, bottom line, the order was placed Saturday night. In error.

02:31 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): Rest assured, mistakes happen, often the mistake is on the other side of the screen (or in the computer or tablet) rather the actual human involved. I understand that.

02:32 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: When I saw the slew of order confirmations in my email the next morning-- Sunday-- I couldn't cancel several of the orders with immediate confirmation which was frustrating.

02:34 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: I definitely won't just pass the responsibility, though I really appreciate that you'd say that, but the cancellation thing was my first irritation.

Then the fact that I couldn't call.

02:35 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): I am sorry for the cancellation not working for you. Often times, our shipments are prepared so quickly and go into the shipping process so fast - it can sometimes cause problems when trying to cancel the orders.

The note about calling, I am not sure why it would not allow you to call. Was it that the number was not available? Or that the Google Phone system just wouldnt allow the number to be dialed?

02:36 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: I can appreciate that as much as I do the fast shipping I frequently enjoy! But unfortunately, Raja overpromised and underdelivered-- which is like, the customer service kiss of death. I know--I've worked in sales and at a call center. I also know it's super easy to do to placate an agitated customer

02:39 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: No, do check it out when you get a chance-- I was pretty surprised, myself. There's a little form you fill out, and AFTER it's complete a little note pops up that says, "hey, you can call our automated line (which I figured would give me the same answer as the automated email), or, our service rep can call you (but you have to have an open phone line).

02:39 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): ahh ok

I know the screen you're talking about

02:40 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: I recently switched to prepaid (saves me $100 bucks a month, and I get to buy other stuff I don't need)

02:40 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): Right beneath the form, there is actually a number there. It's light gray so can be difficult to see. I guess it's "Fine Print" if you want to call it that. That is our direct line customer service number.

Haha, I switched to prepaid as well

866-216-1072

^ that is our customer service number for future reference

02:40 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: Oh my. I will check that out. I may have been blinded by rage and stopped short of it.

02:41 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: Thank you.

02:41 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): It's easy to miss with the big bright yellow buttons on the form

especially on a tablet

You're welcome!

02:42 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: So I received the package today, and was SUPER irritated. As I stated to Raja, I did not want to pay shipping twice.

02:43 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): and rightfully so

02:43 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: AND I was home today, and probably could have intercepted it.

So I immediately came in and started a chat and landed Ernest.

02:44 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: I was short with him because he really seemed to be at least one question behind me.

02:46 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: I know customer service is tricky-- I REALLY try not to be a db customer, but this was my second time on this same thing, and he was not smelling what I was stepping in from the start.

02:47 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): I understand where you're coming from with that. Not to throw anyone under the bus, but I believe he did not see where you were coming from in the chat.

Because the previous agent DID say he successfully cancelled the order.

02:48 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): So Stef, since you have been in customer service, I'll let you drive around this next curve. What do you feel we can do for you to satisfy you.

02:48 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: He said, "So how about you tell me what it is specifically you are wanting in this situation. You wanted the notepads, cancelled, I understand that and they were shipped because they couldn't be cancelled. Are you wanting refunded for the items?

I just need to know what you are wanting in this situation. I can't help you unless I know what it is specifically you are wanting us to do."

02:49 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): Well, we essentially typed the same thing and now I'm at a loss.

02:49 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: Like most customers, I really just wanted to complain!

02:49 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): lol!

02:49 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: I feel like you've let me do that, and I appreciate it.

02:49 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): Well, I dont just want to "fix" the issue and send you on you're way

02:50 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): I want you to feel all warm and fuzzy after this contact in feeling that you are taken care of without me pulling out the charm potion

And depending on your location that could involve a lot of driving, and it just gets messy.

02:51 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: I felt very inconvenienced by being assured it would be taken care of, and then in the very next transaction not listened to.

02:52 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: I would like a refund-- I am happy to send these things back, but I do not want to pay shipping.

02:52 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): Ok, how about this.

02:53 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): How about, I give you the refund, and b/c of all the trouble you've had (including putting up with my horrible attempts at being humor that doesn't come across well in a chat window). And you can keep the items.

So you dont have to go through the whole return process as well

02:53 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: Also, it's not your fault that I tell a story in real-time and can type really fast.

02:53 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): being humor... see what i mean? geesh

02:54 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: And I DO appreciate you not smoke and mirrors-ing me into a complete fit.

02:55 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): That's definitely something we don't want to do here. I believe the previous chat representative attempted to get these orders cancelled and was unable to after the call. He should have sent an email stating he was unable to do so. I will look into that personally.

02:56 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: And I DO appreciate your humor-- I just probably would not laugh at anything other than stealing some poor child's birthday cake.

02:56 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): oh my

We have what's left of someone's going away cake... will that do?

02:56 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: Right now, I mean.... And I've de-escalated--I promise!

02:57 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: YOU WIN!

That got a laugh.

02:57 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): haha

If you give me just a moment, I'll get this refunded for you. No return required.

02:58 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: He did email, and that's in there, it just implied that it was being rerouted.

02:58 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): Right, but it gave you the impression that something WOULD be done, not MIGHT be.

That's not a good experience.

02:59 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: Exactly. Thank you VERY much.

02:59 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): $21.03 will be going back to your card. Most likely Monday due to banking hours.

03:00 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: Okey-dokey. when you check back on Ernest-- I think he did say the right thing... it was just a little too late.

Again, thanks. Those bankers have it made.

03:01 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): Yeah they do!

03:01 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: Is there anything further that I need to do?

03:01 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): Alright Stef, I am glad that I was able to help you out here and that you feel good about what was done.

Not on your end

03:01 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: Warm-fuzzy achieved.

03:02 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): There's no return required so you are not responsible for anything other than making sure you are $21.03 richer by tuesday at the latest

Woo hoo!

03:03 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: Can you please send forward my appreciation for your tailored service to the next level of leadership (or Mr. Amazon, if you have his email)??

03:03 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): I will be sending you a survey through email. You can add your custom comments at the back of that and the entire Leadership chain sees it.

03:04 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: Other than that, I'm set and you can move to the next customer-- who will hopefully be worse (that's pretty selfish of me, sorry)-- with my thanks!

okay, I'll do that

03:05 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): haha, will do. And thank you, it has been a pleasure chatting with you!

03:06 AM(GMT) Stef Ha: Likewise, adios!

03:06 AM(GMT) Jay C(CSA): Bye!

*All of the names have been changed; the only one of not is Raja, the real name of a guy I went on two dates with.... I was ultimately dissatisfied with him, as well. <-- that's not any kind of gross euphemism.